The Urge to Purge

Has anyone else been feeling the urge to purge ? To clear the clutter of Christmas, clear your wardrobe, cupboards or even the loft ? To open the doors and windows and let the air blow through the house ? Since NYE I've had a deep urge to clean and purge. I couldn't really understand why, when the season and social media is telling us we should be resting - hibernating - I'm feeling a power serge ? When I cleared my wardrobe, half of my clothes had to go. Not because I didn't want them, but because I finally felt and listened to my body response when I put each item on ? If it felt energetically heavy or uncomfortable, it had to go.

I also spent an afternoon opening & repacking boxes and moved things around but I realised I had a huge resistance to actually decluttering any of them.

What I was actually doing was playing out old patterns, old trauma responses, from that past story. That past version of self ? My body is letting me know energetically what feels good and in alignment and that Im safe now , yet my brain is still triggering old familiar thoughts and body responses, in an attempt keep me safe. I know I'm grounded and safe & actually creating and thriving in my new home and I'm aligning my passion, purpose and focus in new business. So I stopped, took a few deep breaths to calm my nervous system, and became present with it all. You see, for me, stuffing things in draws and cupboards,

re-boxing stuff up again - letting it get to a point of upset and agitation rather than clearing it out, just in case, its all metaphysically a way of stuffing or "boxing up" difficult emotions that previously I didn't want to look at or deal with? This time I could see the years of conditioning and a recurring trauma responses from living with an abuser for most of my life. Buying & selling - it became like an addiction, my drug of choice. Often even selling the things I thought I valued most. In the the story I had created I believed it was that it was the only option I had at the time . It kept me in a cycle that kept me feeling safe in the unsafe . I felt like I couldn't get out of or change because I had invested so much mentally, physically, emotionally and financially ! Keeping myself in this perpetual cycle meant I didn't have to look at the deeper story. Add to that Make do and mend mentality and saving the planet all rolled into one. It became the only way I knew how to survive. I see this coming to the surface again, not as a bad thing, as this time its landed differently. Its come fully into my awareness. I fully embodied the feelings , thoughts and emotions. I felt it as shedding the last layers of this cycle, shedding the last remaining remnants of a character I once thought I had to play in a life I thought I had to live - just like the snake of 2025 shedding its skin ! Now I feel this as the Fire Horse energy pulsing through me - Breaking through those old stories. Almost catapulting me to make change, to take aligned action , moving sometimes to fast for my brain and body to catch up.

Showing me where I have been resisting change, resisting taking aligned action and not trusting the process. Its reminding me how fiercely Independent I am. Showing me my confidence, self worth and freedom in ways I couldn't comprehend before. Acknowledging that both myself and my clients value my skills, my knowledge, my therapies and my art ! Showing where I've still been looking for or waiting for permission Showing me that when I go into over thinking instead of taking action that I drop back into indecision and fear Its reminding me that emotion is energy in motion and how to fully express that in safe and healthy ways !

So that's why the wardrobe needed clearing - so I could once again change my story, find my own identity again, not who I or others had told me I should be ! I am no longer willing to play that character I had created ! Where have you been resisting change ? What part of you is ready to change the character or story ? What part of you is ready to rise and move ? I can support you to make these changes for yourself Want to find out more drop me a message